Things are to be used and people are to be loved.

People are meant to be loved.

A co-worker just sent me a message on BBM titled: Loved vs Used.

It says:

While a man was polishing his new car, his six-year-old son picked up a stone and scratched lines on the side of the car. In anger, the man took the child’s hand and hit it many times, not realising he was using a wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures. When the child saw his father … with painful eyes he asked “Dad when will my fingers grow back”. The man was hurt and speechless, he went back to his car and kicked it many times. Devastated by his own actions, sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches, the child had written: “love you dad”. The next day that man committed suicide.

The message continues:

Anger and Love have no limits, choose the latter to have a beautiful and lovely life. Things are to be used and people are to be loved. But the problem in today’s world is that people are used and things are loved.

In this year let us be careful to keep this thought in mind. Things are to be used and people are to be loved. Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actins, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become character. Watch your character it becomes your destiny.

This made me think of the situation that I had with my mom over the weekend. We got home from Resego Mogodi’s funeral (Rest in Peace nana) and we were flippin’ tired, so we both napped.

She woke up before me and realised that my car was not under the shade anymore. While trying to park it nicely, she scratched it on the side against a heap of bricks that were close by.

Ooooopss

She woke me up immediately to show me and to apologise. I was furious, but tried to contain my anger. Mistakes happen, you know. But, damn, I was mad!

But now, after reading this message from Tendai, I’m reminded that indeed things are meant to be used and people are meant to be loved.

What’s the fuss about? My mom promised to pay for its fixing? So why was I so mad?

We place so much value on material things. How would I feel if things were the other way round? How would I feel if my mom was hit by a car, instead of my mom scratching the car? Now that would be devastating.

Honestly, I rather she scratched the car and she was not harmed. A car is a car, it can be fixed, it can be sold, it can be replaced and as for my mom on the other had – she’s the only mom I have and I can never replace her and life without her would be not imaginable. 

I’m glad that a friend forwarded this message to me as a reminder that these things are just things and we should instead place more value on the people who love us, who would do anything for us, who want to see us happy and whom life without, would be hell.